"Love"
Lest I sound like a cynical single woman, let me just begin by telling everyone that this post isn’t about me and some vendetta I have against love, but more about the power of society and the media in shaping our thoughts about love and how it’s disgusting. (This could also just be an expression of my own frustration with the media) Also, I cannot pretend that I am superior and don’t ever watch romantic movies, because I definitely enjoy them on occasion. (*while I obviously cannot speak to the entire female gender, I know enough friends and women that also believe in many of these myths that these films perpetuate to justify my broad generalization of women) That being said, these are just some random thoughts I had after watching one of these said ‘romantic’ movies this weekend.
‘Romance’ movies allow girls to believe in a false love. Call me naïve and impressionable, but for a while, I believed that my one true love was out there somewhere and that he would come and find me if I sat on my rear end long enough. These movies make us believe that men are just waiting to sweep us off our feet (thanks “Hitch”) and that if we want it to happen badly enough, it will (insert here any romance film in the history of the world).
In addition, all of these films are exactly the same. Boy meets girl, boy messes up, girl hates him, then boy does something spectacular to make up for it and boy ends up with girl and they live happily ever after in some alternative perfect universe. (keep in mind these gender roles can also be reversed for a new and refreshing point of view…see: “Ever After” and many more)
Furthermore, these movies are NOT realistic (which some would argue make them more enjoyable, see: my mom), something I find incredibly annoying. For instance, when, in the real world, would it ever be okay for a guy to watch your every move, track your love life, and then write a letter confessing his undying love for you? (see: Ethan Embry lusting over Jennifer Love Hewitt in “Can’t Hardly Wait”) If some guy ever did this to me, my first reaction would not be, “aww how cute” but probably “I’m calling the cops.” Romance movies virtually give guys an excuse to stalk girls. Even if I neglected to call the police on him, when, in real life, would I ever end up with a guy like this? Or think, “hmm, maybe after he gets done stalking me, we can grow old together?”
In reality, in order to get love to work out, you have to work hard, and even if you do, this does not guarantee success. Love does not follow a set formula, however much we wish we could just plug in a solution for a said problem to fix it. And men who stalk women are not ‘cute.’ While these movies provide temporary relief from the stresses and strains of work, at what cost? If we live in this false illusions of love and grandeur, then the burden is too much, but if we recognize these movies for the fallacies they have, then we can enable ourselves a few hours of carefree ‘love’ without any consequence.
‘Romance’ movies allow girls to believe in a false love. Call me naïve and impressionable, but for a while, I believed that my one true love was out there somewhere and that he would come and find me if I sat on my rear end long enough. These movies make us believe that men are just waiting to sweep us off our feet (thanks “Hitch”) and that if we want it to happen badly enough, it will (insert here any romance film in the history of the world).
In addition, all of these films are exactly the same. Boy meets girl, boy messes up, girl hates him, then boy does something spectacular to make up for it and boy ends up with girl and they live happily ever after in some alternative perfect universe. (keep in mind these gender roles can also be reversed for a new and refreshing point of view…see: “Ever After” and many more)
Furthermore, these movies are NOT realistic (which some would argue make them more enjoyable, see: my mom), something I find incredibly annoying. For instance, when, in the real world, would it ever be okay for a guy to watch your every move, track your love life, and then write a letter confessing his undying love for you? (see: Ethan Embry lusting over Jennifer Love Hewitt in “Can’t Hardly Wait”) If some guy ever did this to me, my first reaction would not be, “aww how cute” but probably “I’m calling the cops.” Romance movies virtually give guys an excuse to stalk girls. Even if I neglected to call the police on him, when, in real life, would I ever end up with a guy like this? Or think, “hmm, maybe after he gets done stalking me, we can grow old together?”
In reality, in order to get love to work out, you have to work hard, and even if you do, this does not guarantee success. Love does not follow a set formula, however much we wish we could just plug in a solution for a said problem to fix it. And men who stalk women are not ‘cute.’ While these movies provide temporary relief from the stresses and strains of work, at what cost? If we live in this false illusions of love and grandeur, then the burden is too much, but if we recognize these movies for the fallacies they have, then we can enable ourselves a few hours of carefree ‘love’ without any consequence.